Description
From Chapter 68, “Never,” of It’s Impossible by J H McIntosh — Act III: Trust and Letting Go.
With "I’m not saying no, not asking you to wait, I’m still standing here outside the gate," Belle again demonstrates that she is still not ready to risk what loving Aaron would cost her. This is a place where the delicate balance between hope and fear is explored with gentle honesty. It’s a reminder that opening up, even when uncertain, holds its own kind of bravery. Listening to this song offers a tender moment to reflect on the walls we build and the possibility that true connection asks only for patience and presence. Let it be a soft encouragement to embrace what’s still unfolding within.
Lyrics
I don’t know where this fear began,
I only know it calls me by name.
Maybe it’s safer to turn and run,
Maybe that’s why I’ve always done the same.
You say “never” like it’s carved in stone,
Like hearts don’t wander when they’re left alone.
I’ve heard that word spoken a thousand ways,
Every one of them meant for better days.
Maybe I’m not saying no,
Maybe I’m not asking you to wait.
Maybe I’m still standing here,
Outside the gate.
Hope is a risk I’ve learned to doubt,
It builds you up, then takes you out.
Maybe, maybe, I’m still here,
Still holding hands with fear.
They always start by seeing me,
Then loving what they want me to be.
It fades so slow you hardly feel the fall,
Till that day you’re left with nothing at all.
Maybe wanting was never what I fear,
It’s being known, then told I wasn’t here.
Maybe love is not the part that disappears,
Maybe I’m the one who disappears.
There’s a wall I built to stay alive,
Brick by brick, not out of pride.
When beauty’s what they love you for,
You learn that closeness costs you more.
But then you look at me and don’t look away,
Don’t rush my no, don’t beg my stay.
You don’t demand, you don’t pursue,
You wait like truth is mine to choose.
Maybe hope doesn’t knock,
Maybe it pulls you near.
Maybe it asks you to walk,
While still carrying fear.
Maybe I don’t have to run,
Maybe I don’t have to stay.
Maybe love is something true,
That lets me find my way.
Maybe I’m not saying no,
Maybe I’m not asking you to wait.
Maybe I’m still standing here,
Outside the gate.
Hope is a risk I’ve learned to doubt,
It builds you up, then takes you out.
Maybe, maybe, I’m still here,
Still holding hands with fear.
There’s something getting hard to outrun,
If your love’s true, then I’m the guilty one.
I’m the thief that robs my joy,
Still guarding wounds I can’t destroy.
Maybe I’m not saying no,
Maybe I’m not asking you to wait.
Maybe I’m still standing here,
Outside the gate.
Maybe hope is worth the cost,
Maybe I’m not already lost.
Maybe love can still come near,
And not become another fear.
Maybe love is worth the fear it brings,
Maybe God is in the trembling.
For now, I’ll hold what I can’t yet say,
And try to imagine…
Maybe someday.
Maybe someday.
Maybe someday.
Maybe.
